Kat: Where were we? Oh, I know what it was about, it was about being right.
Kit: Being right? Oh, I have a little spiel on that
Kat: laughs
Kit: I was thinking about how we discuss things and don’t argue.
Kat: This is exactly what it’s about. Did you have that thought this evening?
Kit: I was just about to bring exactly this thing up; I can’t believe it!
Kat: Me too.
Kit: How it works, I think, is that I say something, and you say no, you want something else and then…
Kat: Hopefully I don’t start with no, but maybe I say “I see it like this.”
Kit: Ok, whatever, right, and so I go back and I look at it: “Oh, here’s my desire for something, what’s that about?”, and you do the same, and so instead of holding the position solid and trying to make that the demarcation line rather than yours, it’s very fluid and just kind of um…
Kat: it’s really like woo-woo that we had this same thing come clear, like within this evening and wanted to both talk about it and that we’re about to both do it because I…
Kit: I know what triggered it.
Kat: yes, so do I , I know what triggered it, but less interesting; I’d just rather also share the words that I had for that experience which were that you had one thing to say and I have different things to say and we said that back and forth about once or twice and then I saw that moment where ok, all these things exist in the universe like what you said, what I said, how I see it, how you see it, and then there’s that moment with do you want to be busy with “I’m right”? Oh no, that means absolutely nothing to me that’s not what it’s about at all, and I saw it; it’s about this little thing of “I’m right”, you know that people get involved in: “I’m right”, you know; I was going to do my blog on it, but it’s your blogging turn.
Kit: But you can write, sweetie.
Kat: Yes, we found the same thing, it’s fascinating that it actually happened.
Kit: The only book I’ve read about EST was a tell-all by someone who went through it.
Kat: mm hmm
Kit: It started out wham bam in chapter one by having the speaker describe what’s so important about being right.
Kat: uh huh, yeah
Kit: You know, they hit you with it in paragraph one and it really struck me. It’s one of those lightbulb things where some asssumption that you’ve always made doesn’t apply any more. Very interesting; it gives you a whole lot of flexibility when you let go of those bits of…
Kat: It’s amazing what it does when you let go of those things, especially when you let go of it with consciousness…
Kit: Mm hmm
Kat: …and – I’m utterly fascinated that we both got that same thing from our experiences.
Kit: Well, where I thought it came from was that you were talking some time, maybe yesterday, I think we were sitting on the sofa, about how we should continue this writing and that we should continue to talk with each other about our experience, but what we should do is go further and go into the why and how does that work, and all that stuff…
Kat: Sort it out and where did it come from.
Kit: …and so I think that my idea rose out of that conversation.
Kat: I also ended the blog with that last thing.
Kit: Aah, okay
Kat: How does that happen?
Kit: Yes, uh huh
Kat: well I got it this evening from the conversation that we were having and I passed on from the conversation which wasn’t the important part of the experience because it was the learning which was important and it was some back and forth where I had one viewpoint and you had another and there was a moment when I saw it and you had sort of spoken your word and I had spoken mine and I thought ok, good, well all of that is out here and it all is real and exists and there’s that moment: was I going to go further with I’m right, whatever is you doesn’t exist because I’m right…
Kit: mm hmm
Kat: …and I just saw that whole thing, I thought, you know, yeah, that’s one of the things that we do is, you know, we don’t really waste any time that I’m right.
Kit: But you are right.
Kat: We are, we are indeed.
Kit: No, I’m joking.
Kat: So am I.
Kit: You’re perfectly right about that.
Kat: Maybe we do things not only right, but perfectly right.
Kit: It makes things very easy to do, and very simple.
Kat: It does.
Kit: A whole lot of clutter gets removed from your mind.
Kat: I know, it’s amazing, it seems like such a simple thing to do.
Kit: Right.
Kat: You have to do it with consciousness, it’s gotta be like a real – you have to – I mean, after a while, of course, you align yourself more and more, so it’s not even an occurrence that happens in the mind.
Kit: Right, but also I think it’s a question of trust; it can only start happening when we trust each other…
Kat: How it starts happening is the question.
Kit: …and trust is something that builds up over a period of time. You might start with an assumption of trust, which is great because it moves things forward, but you know how I experienced you trustwise was basically the sum of all my experiences with you over a period of time, and the longer that went on, the more I understood how you worked and what you were and that kind of stuff, right? And developed a knowing of you.
Kat: Mm-hmm, I know exactly what you’re saying.
Kit: The trust that builds up between us – has built up between us – is really important in this kind of lack of argument; I mean, when you experience the other person as a truthful and honest and present and…
Kat: Constant.
Kit: …constant and yet completely as important and as autonomous as me, then what would be the point of taking a position?
Kat: Mm hmm
Kit: At that stage, it doesn’t make any sense anyway.
Kat: Maybe a lot of it is habitual behavior, that I’m right, all those kinds of things.
Kit: Well, perhaps that’s because people start out from a position of non-trust and perhaps if you start from that position, you can’t get past it.
Kat: Sure you can, you just have to become aware.
Kit: Mm hmm
Kat: You just develop a different appetite, you know; you follow your attraction to lack of that kind, you know, you devalue that experience.
Kit: Right.
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